barricadescoffeeandnewsboys:

One time when I was in fifth grade, my teacher gave out report cards and he said to us “Don’t open these before you get home,” and we kept trying to come up with reasons why someone would open them before they go home and one person said “If I have a glove on and open it, then I didn’t open it, the glove did,” and then my teacher said “If I have a knife and stab you with it then I didn’t do it, the knife did,” he was a great teacher

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